counter surfing

It is winter olimpic time right now and I came up with my own sport!  Counter Surfing!!  I wish I could be in the olimpics to compete.  I wud get the gold medal for sure!  This is whut I did tonight while dinner wuz being made.  I counter surfed and taked a big bite of a head of lettuce!

mudder yelled out No Percy, don't you dare".  but I dared.

why is it callt a head of lettuce inyway?  it does not have a body....